Saturday, November 13, 2010

Days 26 & 27

So, I know I didn't post last night. And I'm not going to focus a lot on yesterday. I'm actually not going to focus a lot on today, mainly because nothing major happened on either day.

However, there's a issue that has come up, and I feel like venting about it. I'm starting to question a friend's sincerity, and it's really getting to me. This is someone who's been a friend for awhile now, and I've loved that. But lately, I get the feeling that they aren't being straight with me. And that bothers me. For way too long, I dealt with "friends" who were fake--they lied to me and essentially led me on, only to decide they didn't want to be friends anymore, and that it was entirely my fault. One friend never gave me a reason for ending the friendship (and that hurt the worse), and another basically told me that I was never there, even though this particular "friend" flaked on me a lot, and only wanted me around when she was having problems. She even went so far as to get mad because I had other people that I wanted to hang out with, too, even though I spent the entire afternoon with her driving around and listening to her vent about her problems. But, to her, I wasn't a good friend. And you know what? It's honestly whatever at this point. Those two people did nothing but bring unwanted drama into my life, and I've been so much happier without them.

But with this person today, I'm getting pretty angry. I'm sick of having people lie to me, and I'm sick of feeling like I'm being left in the dark. I'm sick of not being entirely sure who my friends are and who I can trust. I tend to be a very trusting person, but honestly, I've been burned so many times that I'm not sure I can be anymore. And that sucks. I've always liked that I felt that I could trust people. And I liked that even after the crap I've been through the past couple of years that I felt I could still trust people. So for me to not know if I can continue to sucks. And I hate it.

Hopefully this situation will get better.

No comments:

Post a Comment